Sexcapades

Hello *coughs* oh wow, so much dust in here. Is any one home? Look at all these cobwebs ๐Ÿ˜‚. Heeeeeeeyyyyyy guys!!! I know, it’s been such a long time. Oh wow. I’ve missed you guys so much, Omoooooo ๐Ÿ˜‚. Anyway, how are you?!! How’s the new year? Happy New Year everyone.

I’m back and welcome to another post on sex sex sex ๐Ÿฅณ๐Ÿฅณ๐Ÿฅณ. I’m sure all you pervs are excited ๐Ÿ˜‚.

So today, we will be talking about sexualities, two in particular that I feel aren’t talked about enough. Now, I don’t belong to either one of them so if I misrepresent please let me know in the comment section below. We are all learning. Now, let’s get right into it.

Asexuality and Demisexuality

Asexuality is according to Wikipedia the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or desire for sexual activity. It may be considered a sexual orientation or the lack thereof. While;

Demisexuality is according to Healthline a sexual orientation where people only experience sexual attraction to folks that they have close emotional connections with.

Starting with the former, asexuals are normal humans like you and I who just don’t seem to find interest in sex or find anyone particularly sexual. Now, they do sometimes have sexual desire and libido but they don’t find anyone sexually appealing. So, quite a number of them masturbate to calm their sexual urges. This doesn’t mean asexual people don’t have relationships or don’t get married, they do and they sometimes also have sex for certain reasons which include;

Satisfying their sexual libido, conceiving children, satisfying their partners, to have the sexual experience and so on. It’s worthy to note that asexuality isn’t the same thing as abstinence or celibacy which are both choice and asexuality isn’t. Also, an asexual person doesn’t necessarily not have sex as I’ve mentioned earlier. It is also not a medical condition, nothing is wrong with asexual people, they don’t need to be treated or worked upon. It is just how they are.

Now, moving on to the latter, Demisexuality. Demisexual people only feel sexually attracted to people who they have formed a deep emotional bond with. They can be straight, gay or of any sexual orientation but only develop sexual attraction with people they’ve known and bonded with. This doesn’t mean to say they are attracted to every person who they share a deep bond with. And the bond doesn’t necessarily have to be romantic (they don’t have to be in love with the person), it can be platonic based on friendship bonds.

Demisexual people do not feel primary attraction, which is the feeling you have towards a person you just met. They only feel secondary attraction, that is feelings that develop over time. Demisexuality doesn’t mean someone is a prude or scared of sex, they just don’t feel sexually attracted to people they just met. It’s not as a result of a moral or religious choice, it’s not a choice at all. It’s now they’re wired. It is also not caused by an underlying trauma or medical condition, it’s not a problem that needs to be fixed.

Asexuality and Demisexuality are two sexual orientation or preferences that people misconstrue more often than not. People belonging to these groups have to deal with a lot of criticism and stereotypes. I hope you learnt a thing or two from this and that in the future, you do a little research on a subject before forming an opinion.

Till next time, class is dismissed.

Amy โฃ๏ธ

Letting go

Hola! Mi Corazons. Heyyy!! I want to say Iโ€™m back but Iโ€™m the biggest liar in the world so Iโ€™ll just say Iโ€™m sorta back. To be honest, my ghosting is justified because everything has just be going one kind one kind but I guess that should have given me more reasons to write, yeah? [โ€ฆ]

Letting go

I Am Tayad!!!

Guys!!! I din have strength and for pleasantries today as you can see from my header. Life is tiring me!!!

Just this Sunday that passed, I was sad and lonely for no reason and then frustrated and angry in the evening cos of school stuff. Then I woke up to find out that some young girl was being physically abused by her beast of a boyfriend and some human beings are actually defending him!!!

Omoooooo!!! E be tinz ooo. On top of that, this sarz thing seems to be getting worse and nothing is being said by our government except trash!

School is not even making things funny at all and on top of that, I’m broke ๐Ÿ˜ฉ. Who did I offend bayi?

At this point, I’m tired, frustrated, stressed, angry, sad and broke! Why?!!!

The only thing making me a bit happy rn is the website I just created for my podcast, Expressions and the fact that I’m getting back on it. Watch out for that btw, this Saturday.

This is obviously not a long or very coherent post (pardon the typos) but I just had to rant to you guys cos I know you always get me.

Am I the only one who is dealing with a lot? How are you guys coping with it all? Please let me know in the comment section below.

Till next week, stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy.

Amy โฃ๏ธ

The Modern Feminist

Hey my ladies and gentlemen of the modern era, It’s another week and we all know what that means. Welcome to

Feminism and Sexuality

How has your week been? It’s Wednesday, so we’re half way through it. Yaaaaaaaaay ๐Ÿฅณ. Anyways, let’s dive right into this week’s post.

I was reading this book on Wattpad titled Collared and it is kinda the inspiration for this week’s post.

The book is basically about this young woman, Abigail who works in a Feminist publishing company owned by her mum and a very sucessful Greek American architect Preston Tristan. Now, Abby has always been into the kinkier side of life, if you know what I mean. You don’t? Okay, I mean BDSM Specifically the S and M part. She’s a Submissive and a Masochist. Tristan is a Dominant and a Sadist who owns an exclusive BDSM club.

For the most part of her life, Abby has been pretty closeted about that part of her life. She didn’t understand how to reconcile her love to be controlled and brutally humiliated with her passion for equal rights for women which brings us to today’s topic ” Feminism and Sexuality.”

I’ll like to reiterate that unless otherwise stated, anything and everything I say on this blog post, previous or subsequent ones are my personal opinions backed by facts that I provide when necessary. You don’t have to agree with them. Thank you ๐Ÿ˜Š



So, how do you reconcile certain sexual fantasies, fetishes etc with the continuous fight for equality? Well, you just do.

I’ll have you remember that it’s because of these fights that a woman can even say at any point in time that she’s a sub or a dom or a masochist or whatever else there is. A while back, or not so much anyways, we were all expected to be submissives and not the good kind. We had and still unfortunately have partners who don’t give two fucks how we felt or what we were into. It took the courage of our collective effort to be able to look scumbags in the eyes and tell them No! No. No. No. No. No. No. Nopitty. Nope!
No. Thank you very much sir, but you are crap.

Now, evolving, we are discovering more about ourselves, more about our likes and needs and some of them seem to be in direct contrast with our fights and we just are stuck. I for one am so glad we are at a stage we even have choices to be confused over. But you’re thinking, I want equal rights with a man who I also want to slap me senseless. How does that even work?๐Ÿ˜‚ I’ll tell you how.



For those of you who actually have good knowledge about the BDSM world, you know that the sub is always in charge. It’s why it’s consented and most times has a contract and stuff. The minute YOU decide you’re no longer into, YOU can put an end to it. You control what happens to you, how, when and by who, even for how long. You might be the one on your knees saying “Master Please” but he’s truly the one begging.

What I’m trying to say with all these long talk ๐Ÿ˜‚ is that, whatever sexual fantasies you have, you live in a world that’s constantly fighting for your right to choose them. Do not put all our collective work to shame by letting anyone make you feel wrong about it. Okay? Good. Insofar as it’s your choice and consented to, then please baby girl, go be a hoe!๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ˜‚ Or not too ๐Ÿคญ

I struggled with all these myself too and still am so I honestly know how difficult it can be. The most important thing is to be true to yourself and your needs. When you love yourself, what you truly want or need will be clearer. Just go with that shamelessly. Remember to make sure you’re not hurting anyone and you don’t abandon your principles.

That’s my gist for this week. What do you think about it? Would you be giving the book a glance? Let me hear all your thoughts in the comment section below.

Also, quick reminder to attend my upcoming virtual book launch. To join, click here

I love you all. Till next week, stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy.

Amy โฃ๏ธ

I Need To Lower My Parents Expectations

Hello folks, welcome to yet another post on

And yes, you read the Header right, my parent’s expectations of me are high and I need to f*cking lower them.

I know it sounds weird because you might be like, why would you want your parents to think or expect less from you, well I’ll answer that with a scenario we might all be familiar with. You remember in primary or secondary school when there’s a test or assignment and some people did really well, say 8/10 or so and there were some people who had about 5/10. In that scenario, you expect the people in the former category to be applauded more than those in the latter right? But no, they’re not because they’re the supposed brilliant ones who maybe have extra lessons and do well all the time. So, the teacher expects them to be at the top always and it’s nothing new that they scored that.

Sometimes the teacher even scolds them and says they could have done better but those ones in the latter category are praised. They’re not the brightest and the teacher wasn’t expecting much from them anyways, so any point higher than their normal is seen as a surprise and the teacher is proud of them!

Now, I know you might not understand how that’s a problem but as someone who was this as a student, it is extremely exhausting trying to live up to everyone’s expectations and it’s even worse when you’re not even praised or applauded when you do cos well, they were expecting it! Now imagine having to deal with this at home.

I realized my parents have really high expectations of me and have a different standard for me than they do of my siblings and maaaaaaaaan, I’m tayad!!!๐Ÿ˜ฉ

I can’t even be a bad child. I can’t do things I’d love cos they’ll kill me but when my siblings do the same exact thing, it’s free falling for them. I’ll give you an illustration. Recently, I wanted to go over to a friend’s place and stay over, first time in my life actually ๐Ÿ˜‚, and I was barely allowed two nights. Infact, on the last day, my mum started calling by 12pm asking if I’m on my way already, as how na?๐Ÿ˜•

Just a week after, my brother leaves the house and was out for close to a month and we were all looking ooo. The agreed terms was one night, two at most and he passed that by 3 weeks. When he got back home, maybe 30 minutes of scolding and life’s back to normal. You can see what I’m talking about right?

Now, to my plans of lowering their expectations. I. Need. Help!!! If you have any suggestions for me, I’ll be happy to hear them all abeg ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ.

I am thinking, maybe I release a nude picture and have instablog blow it up, what do you think ๐Ÿค”. I trust that one of you will be volunteering their houses for me to live ๐Ÿ˜‚ cos that’s definitely going to end in me being disowned.

Anyways, I just decided to rant to you guys as y’all are so easy to talk to. Don’t forget to drop all your thoughts in the comment section below. Also, if you’re still not following me by now, why nau? Are we fighting? Please click the follow button. Thank you ๐Ÿ˜Š.

Till next week for another post, stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy. I love you all.

P. S. I am launching a new anthology that I co-authored very soon and would love you all to be there. Here’s the link; http://bit.do/Of-scented-candles

Make sure to spread the word too. Thank you ๐Ÿ˜Š

Amyโฃ๏ธ

Sexcapades

Hey guys, how have you been doing? Welcome to the third and final interview blog post. Are you excited?!!! I know I am.

Our guest today is a writer, vlogger, Feminist, content creator, model, a mental health activist and a voice for change.



She is the Author of 4 books and the PRO for a sex ed group.

She is also a medical student. Well, we happen to have such powerful women don’t we? Let’s dive into the interview.


Q/ Could we meet you?

A/ My name is Adeyinka Atilola, mostly known as Atty.



Q/ What was your first contact with any form of sexual education?

A/ Sexual education, hmm. I stumbled upon a book on it when I was about 9, I’ve always loved reading growing up and I was a very very curious child.



Q/ Where would you say Nigeria is at with sexual education?

A/ Honestly, we are nowhere near anywhere. We are stagnant, silent.
People continue to inherit the silence of their ancestors about sex ed and it is sad.



Q/ A lot of us feel weird with a lot of sexually explicit contents, like movies or books. Do you still look away or skip on sexual content on the TV?

A/ No way. what is life without a little smut? Winks



Q/ From your bio, you are affiliated with a sex ed group, what would you say is your reason for being involved in that?

A/ Well, at first it started as me just wanting people to learn new things about their body but now it has grown into me wanting people to learn new things about not just their bodies but the bodies of their partners because I’ve realized a lot of people know next to nothing.



Q/ Do you think there’s any relationship between our current sexual crimes pandemic and our level of sex education?

A/ Yes. If we were educated more about these things, we wouldn’t believe taking it forcefully is a good way to learn about it.




Q/ What is your opinion on sexually active teenagers? To encourage or dissuade and why?

A/ I think this generation needs to focus more on safe sex rather than abstinence because that doesn’t work anymore. If you are going to do it anyways, you might as well be educated about it so you don’t make mistakes you’ll regret forever.



Q/ Humour me, what would you say is your favourite part of sex?๐Ÿ˜‰

A/ Lol. No comment.

Of course ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚. Moving on…



Q/ Any particular aspect of sex that you feel is always misunderstood or misrepresented?

A/ Every part of it is almost always misunderstood, it should be more than just a hump hump. People need to actually learn to enjoy it without rushing to the finish line. You’ll get there, enjoy the ride. If you know what I mean.



Q/ What do you think is the way forward with sex Ed in Nigeria?

A/ Life would be so much better here if we started speaking about sex more often and just stop treating it like something that should be kept in the dark because like it or not, these things happen.


Ooookkkay! That was fun, wasn’t it? I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing. If you have any questions or comments whatsoever, do drop it all in the comment section below ๐Ÿ˜‰. Thank you so much for your time.

Till the next post, stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy.

Amy โฃ๏ธ

The Modern Feminist

Feminism In Third World Countries

Hey there! Miss me? Been a while, I know but life happened. Don’t be too angry at me ๐Ÿ˜‰. I believe we are all still fighting the good fight, despite how incredibly stressful it is. Just like we had last week, we are having another interview today.

Our guest today is a spoken word poet, content developer for WHISPA mobile app, a graphic designer and writer. She happens to be a Jack of all trades, master of some.

She is also the author of the e-book, “Would NEVER BE SILENT AGAIN” and co-author of “Once Upon a Time” both available for purchase on okadabooks.

Juliet Nnaji

She has performed at some remarkable events; including LABAF 2018 and moonlight tales 2019. Had her poem personally read and selected by Prof. Wole Soyinka to mark the World poetry day 2019 organized by Providus bank

She connects to the world through the use of her pen and poetry.


Q/ Hello, can we meet you?

A/ My name is Juliet Nnaji, and I am a feminist.



Q/ What would you say Feminism means to you?

A/ Feminism is a way of life for me.



Q/ Do you think Feminism differs from country to country and how?

A/ The only thing that is different is the people. Feminism is literally the same thing everywhere. We are all fighting for the same thing. “To stop the systematic oppression and marginalization of women. To stop the injustices, rape, abuse, and every little thing that makes women unsafe, scared, and blamed, to stop men and society for treating women as second class citizens “. Whatever country you are doesn’t change this fight.



Q/ What is it like being a Feminist in a third world country?

A/ I don’t know what a third world country is. But I know what it is like being a feminist in Nigeria. Facing stereotypes, dealing with misogynists, and patriarchal people who believe they understand this fight. They don’t but thank the universe for the feminist community. People who understand the anger you feel, and are ready to be the watchman in this war women didn’t ask to be in. They make it easier because I no longer feel bad for being queer. I am sure they understand my anger and are prepared to fight with me and with every other woman until we see the change we seek. And guess what, “no woman is left behind”.

Q/ What would say has been the best and the hardest thing about being a Feminist?

A/ The best part is seeing your growth. Watching the women around you break free from things every one considered as the norm. Watching women be themselves, win, and find their voice in a society where everyone expects them to swallow their voice. The hardest part is simply being a woman, seeing the baby steps you have to take, the price you have to pay with your mental health as you fight to be sane in a Nigerian society.

Feminism is a way of life for me.

Q/ Do you have any big plans regarding the movement that you can’t achieve because of your location? What are they?

A/ Yes, I have big plans for women. I want a safe space for women. Where we won’t be groped, catcalled, raped, harmed, assaulted, harassed, beaten, forced to do stuff to feed the egos of the almighty male, where the sight of a man walking behind us in daylight or at 10 pm doesn’t make our heart want to leap out from our chest as it pounds in fear and makes us quicken our pace. With time though, I hope to get to as many poor women as I can to help them understand that they shouldn’t settle for less or allow anyone to make them feel inferior for simply being a woman. And I hope I get the funds to be able to reach as many as these women as possible.

And for feminist women, I also have bigger plans that I can’t achieve because of location and maybe money. Being a feminist in this 21st century takes a toll on your mental health. So I have plans for creating a safe space somewhere where feminist women can just breathe and connect with other women. Like a healing center where we get to laugh every one of our pains away. And I don’t have the right resources or location ATM. But I am speaking it into reality as I hope the universe helps me achieve this.



Q/ Where did your journey start from, why did you choose to stand with this movement?

A/ I have always been a rebel, always had questions while growing up, and saw the way, my brothers were treated differently from me. It made me angry. As I grew more, read more, visited more places, met more people, and began to see, hear, and watch men do horrible things to women, me inclusive, the anger germinated into so much more that I needed a safe space to vent it all out. There are so many injustices against women happening daily, so I needed to be a part of a movement who would understand this anger I feel because they feel it too as we join our voices to bring the change we so desire even though they seem subtle. Finding the feminist movement and standing with them as we fight collectively while looking out for one another is another reason why I allow myself to smile through all of life’s storm and the hurdles that come with being a Feminist in Nigeria. The feminist community is my safe space. The feminist women in this movement are my sisters who want the growth of women. Standing with them is everything.

Q/ People say it’s impossible to be Feminist and not have a role model, do you think that’s true? And do you have any?

A/ A lot of people taught me the things I know. Reading Chimamanda’s book at an early age where I didn’t know there was a feminist community, gave me so much hope and gave me that feeling that I wasn’t alone and that there were people out there who would understand my queerness even though those around me at that time didn’t. As I grew older and read more books and discovered more women like Maya Angelou, Oprah, Amandla Sternberg, Buchi Emecheta, Virginia Woolf, and every woman whose story and voice have made mine louder, it opened my eyes, gave me more purpose and more strength to want to break a lot of limitations, So, yes I do have role models. And I also believe everyone should do them, what works for them. If you don’t want a role model, screw what anybody thinks. It is very possible to be a feminist and not have a role model.

Q/ As a writer and content creator, does your Feminist tendencies rub off on your works? And do those make it easier to relate with or harder?

A/ Yes, it sure rub off on my works as I try to use my works or writing to connect with as many women as I can reach. It gets lonely on these streets so finding a way to relate is sometimes easier, and other times, a tad bit hard because you start going to a place in your heart that makes you go low as you pen these stories, wondering about the women who it is their reality. But in the long run, you have to wheel yourself to heal knowing that your art would be a source of comfort as these women either finds their voice or feel liberated from knowing that they are not alone.



Q/ What would you like to say to people in this movement with you?

A/ We are change-makers!! And though it doesn’t feel like we are making any huge changes at the moment, soon though, we are going to look back and smile for creating a safe space for women, for liberating women, for always spitting out the truth even as the world dares us to choke. We are heard.


Phew! That was a lot wasn’t it? But it’s seeing and hearing things like this, knowing there are people who feel this strongly about this movement that gives me strength everyday to keep fighting, keep using my voice as much as I can. I hope this resonated within you and gives you that push, that motivation you’ve been seeking for a while now.

Did you enjoy the interview? Any comments? Or questions for the or Juliet? Don’t forget to lay it all in the comment section and you can be sure I’ll get to every single one of them.

Till next week for another post, stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy. I love you all.

Amy โฃ๏ธ

Just Amy

Hello folks! Welcome to this week’s post on

Happy new month, week, even day sef ๐Ÿ˜‚. I’m sorry for being incognito this past few weeks, did you all miss me?๐Ÿคญ.

Now that almost everywhere is open, where would you be looking to go first? I would love to go to the cinemas but that’s not open yet, annoyingly. I am going on a date on Friday tho, wish me luck ๐Ÿ˜‰.

Anywaaaaaays! To today’s post, it’s a different kind of post today. We’re having an interview ๐Ÿฅณ๐Ÿฅณ๐Ÿฅณ.


Our guest is a Generation Z baby girl who wears many hats.

A Market Research Executive in the making, the Adulting Coach you need, Fiction writer and in a couple of years, a scriptwriter and casting director.

She confesses to not knowing how to dance, drive a car or use a gun ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚but that is because she hasn’t activated Eboseremen 10.0. We’ll look out for that.

She tends to be a hyperactive daydreamer which I can relate to, and we both agree we’ll talk the ears off our future husbands. Poor souls ๐Ÿ˜‚

What more? She is a walking Tinder for Friends, so if you want to make friends or need advice on Adulting, she is the girl. Now, let’s delve into this interview ๐ŸŽ‰


Q/ A lot of people know you as different things, I knew you first as “The paperback plug”. Would you please tell us your name?

A/ Eboseremen๐Ÿ˜Š


Q/ Tell me, what inspired you to start selling paperback books?

A/ Okay, so I get lucky when it comes to finding books. I tend to walk around the streets or the market and just find people selling great & affordable books and I would buy tons. Buttttt thanks to my hectic 9-5, I do not read as much as I would love to. So, I would just buy for friends/family and just place books everywhere (I have a shopping problem by the way๐Ÿ˜‚)

One day, Bolu, an amazing friend asked me if I could help her buy 5k worth of books. I thought it was a joke until she sent the money. I bought the books and delivered them to her. She was my first customer and she gifted me almost 100 paperback bags to package deliveries in.

With time I carved out my brand goal: To help book lovers find affordable paperbacks in the best condition. Affordability is the goal here!


Q/ You’re a life coach and give adult hacks, How’d you come across that?

A/ All my life I have been the youngest person among my โ€œpeersโ€. Skipping classes placed me ahead of my agemates. This means often enough, I had experienced some things before they did. I enjoyed telling them the things that happened and helping them not make similar mistakes. With time, this extended to those who were younger than me also.

In 2013, I lost my mom and gained admission into the university. I was 15 but I had to grow up and start adulting.

Adulting is hard and there are tons of teenagers and young people with questions. I have made mistakes, I have learned and grown too. I want to be able to help others avoid similar mistakes and flourish at this adulting thing. Adulting is hard but it is not impossible๐Ÿ˜Š


Q/ Almost everyone who is passionate about mental health has a story to it, especially a way they take care of there’s. What is yours?

A/ Growing up mental health wasn’t something I knew about I guess like most Nigerian children. Nobody told you about taking care of your mind. Nobody told you about depression. So you will get depressed but didn’t know you’re depression or what was wrong with you. Yes, that happened to me a lot and like I’m a very happy hyper person, but I would be so sad. It’s like they put out all the sunshine in me and I was just shrinking.

For years I didn’t know what was wrong with me. Then I went to the University and I stilll didn’t know what was wrong with me because it’s not like they’re smarter there anyway, but I was now a lot more exposed. To an extent, I understood I was depressed but it’s not like you could get help for it. I had this mindset to do everything possible to stay happy.

Then for over two years and some month I was in a very toxic relationship. At first I didn’t know it was toxic, it was with time I started realising it but I was so deep into it, I felt I couldn’t get out. It took friends and grace of God to move on. But as I got out I had to start with another really big problem in my life.

So prior to all this. Yes, I got depressed but it was life incidences bringing me down. Like, death of loved ones, schoolwork and now I was doubting everything about myself. My self-worth, doubting that God loved me, doubting I deserved anything I got because this relationship really messed with my head. I came out of that relationship like really drained because I wasn’t myself in any way. My friends, yes, they had gotten me out of the relationship, but they couldn’t get Ebose back. There was a time, I was willing to have carry overs and that wasn’t an Ebose thing, Ebose didn’t do carry overs. That was how bad it got I was not going to church, I wasn’t praying. I just shrunk into myself. It was really bad. I wasn’t writing for a very long time.

So I think I started following some pages on Instagram? I don’t even know what or who or how it happened, but I came in contact with a bunch of people and that was the point a switch went on something in me said this is not Ebose, you need to take back what is yours. By then I was very well aware of mental health and I could admit to myself that there was a problem and I think that was when I decided to start taking conscious to watch what I do to myself.

So some would say I became guarded. I don’t think I became too guarded I just decided to be careful the people I let in, the content I let in and so this is how I take care of my mental health. I pick up vibes, God I pick up vibes like magnet. If you’re vibe is draining like if your personality feels draining to me, I have to let you go. I just have to, I can’t do this, you have to go. If not, I am going to feel depressed. It’s going to be really bad. So when I meet people and all they can seems to focus on is the bad, the problem, I’m going to absorb everything and then I’m going to not focus on anything else just that.

I said picking up on the people I come in contact with, what kind of persona, what kind of vibes do they give off, once I feel whatever it is you’re giving off will drain me, I let it go. It is hard because I have a want to take care of everybody personality, but I can’t take care of everybody. It’s one of the things I’ve had to teach myself, Ebose you cannot take care of everyone. People know what is wrong with them most of the time and they are fine with it, you’re the one who isn’t fine with it. Just let people go and don’t think everyone has a problem because you have a problem with it. Just let them go.

And another thing I watch is what I consume. There’s so much information. Like there’s only so much information I can take in at a time and I am so hell-bent on staying, you know happy so I get stressed out easily and I’m at a point in my life where work is driving me crazy. There’s so much to do. I have made it something I have to do everyday, take out time from my day to do something that relaxes me.
It could be sleep, it could be watching an episode of a Korean series I’m currently enjoying, it could be talking to you friend, making a call. If my head feels buzzy, like when I try to focus on something, I just feel I’m hearing a buzz, and I can’t do anything, I do that. I unplug because if I don’t and I keep pushing myself, I’m going to get to a point I will break and if I break, that means I have to get professional help. I’m trying not to get to that point I was at years ago, like roughly four, five years ago. I’m trying not to get back to that point I was at after that relationship because that was the most horrible period of my entire life and if I relapse into that I’m afraid I would never be able to come up.

Yeah, so that’s my story and I take care of my mental health by watching the content I consume, watching people who come around me and making sure to unplug when I’m the person being the problem in my life. Basically. Yeah.


Q/ How unbalanced do you think the mental health of most adults are and what would you be doing about it?

A/ Very unbalanced!
You have young people being depressed and not knowing it. Our generation has come up with temporary measures to fix mental health issues and society encourages that.

Work is being done and people are already learning but soooo much more needs to be done!



Q/ I saw a video of you trying on make-up yourself for the first time ๐Ÿ˜‚. Please, indulge me.

A/ My friend is a YouTuber and she wanted to do a โ€œget your friend to do your makeup blindfoldedโ€ thing. This would have been a greattt idea oh๐Ÿ˜Š
But then she remembered that Ebose generally has no idea about makeup. She called me over and we shot the video. It was hilarious because it was the whole truth๐Ÿ˜‚ I truly do not know how to make anyone up. I love makeup but cannot use it๐Ÿ˜‚



Q/ I know for a fact you’re a brilliant writer, are you working on anything right now? A book, blog?

A/ Yes, a book. It is a rewrite of the only book I ever finished in 2017. I am excited for it.
I am also planning on creating content for my blog where I shall focus on Adulting Lifehacksโœจ



Q/ What’s your favourite book of all time? Mine’s Fifty Shades Darker

A/ All the books in the Shopaholic series. I am a Shopaholic myself, I have a slightttt handle on it largely because I am broke though๐Ÿ˜‚


Q/ What is one thing you do almost everyday that others might find weird?

A/ Okay. So this is not weird to many but I have a lot of one-man plays. It is usually dialogue from ongoing stories. I have loved ones who think I am crazy and I have had to tone it down.

My imagination overrides my reality๐Ÿ˜‚



10. Do you have anything you’ll like to tell us teens and young adults about mental health?

A/ See, your mental health is very important.

Your parents might not understand it, your boss at work most definitely doesn’t get it, but you should get it because it’s kind of like your phone, right?

Your phone right now is something you really love and your headphones or earpiece, you like listening to music, you like watching your movies, like reading your books, you really like your phone, right? So you will not take your phone and hand it to a baby willingly. Because they will break your phone and everyone will be like, you handed it to the baby. It’s kind of like your fault.

The way you take care of your phone. I need you to start taking care of your mental health like that. It’s like when we have money we get physical upkeep, right?
When our body is ill, we get treatment but when our minds are stressed out we say it’s going to fix itself. It doesn’t work that way.

I know they say the mind is powerful, but it won’t treat itself. You have to help it.
So if you feel when you are associating with something, It doesn’t help you and you just leave that conversation drain, you won’t just have toxic romantic relationships, you have toxic relationships generally, platonic, family-based, romantic, work-based.

Know how to interact in those relationships that does not drain, know the kind of content you consume. It’s not everything you have to take in because people are taking it in. It’s not everything you should necessarily have to speak on. Some people are more delicate than others, let’s face it. Some people are just super tough. And they’ll be like, “yeah I did that same thing too. And nothing happened to me. Why can’t you handle it?” Yes, let them know, “I’m different from you.” Okay, so I need you to take care of your mental health.

I need you to focus on helping your mind to be better. I need you to also remember this, when you pay attention to content people put out, “Oh, you’re not good enough or you’re this or you’re that” and you internalize it, your mind is going to absorb it and then you start showing it in your daily activities. You don’t need that. I mean if you have an amazing voice and you keep believing you don’t, you’re not gonna be able to sing for Jack, you’re always going to feel nervous. You would feel stupid and your confidence will drop, it will never feel good enough.

So I need you to start taking care of your mental health the way you take care of your phone, your glasses, if you use glasses, that novel that was signed by the author, your game, if you play.

I need to start taking care of yourself and understanding that you matter in this space, this time and you are here for a reason. If your mind is sick, if your mind is ill and you refuse to take care of it, you refuse to pay attention to it and you hand over the gear for your mind to people who do not know what they’re doing, you’re doing yourself the biggest disfavor. Thank you very much.


Splendid, wasn’t it guys? What a refreshing individual. Did you guys enjoy this interview? Should I look into doing more? Let me hear all about it in the comment section. Really guys, I’ve missed you all a lot ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿคญ๐Ÿคญ

Till next post, stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy.

Amy โฃ๏ธ

Sexcapades

Pheromones

According to Wikipedia, Sex pheromones are pheromones released by an organism to attract an individual of the opposite sex, encourage them to mate with them, or perform some other function closely related with sexual reproduction.

In most animals, the relationship between pheromones and mating is straightforward. Human pheromones, on the other hand, are highly individualized, and not always noticeable. Dr. Cutler’s original studies in the ’70s showed that women who have regular sex with men have more regular menstrual cycles than women who have sporadic sex. Regular sex delayed the decline of estrogen and made women more fertile. This led the research team to look for what the man was providing in the equation. By 1986 they realized it was pheromones.

There’s more on how pheromones affect women’s menstrual cycles. Think back to college, or to growing up if you had sisters. Most women who live with or near other women adjust their menstrual cycle timing to each other. A recent study at the University of Chicago by Martha McClintock exposed a group of women to a whiff of perspiration from other women. It caused their menstrual cycles to speed up or slow down depending on the time in the month the sweat was collected — before, during or after ovulation. This was the first proof that people produce and respond to pheromones.

Whether or not pheromones initially affect sexual attraction, other research has indicated that humans might be using a different set of subtle smell cues to help select our mates. Variation in the major histocompatibility complex (MHC), an important set of immune system genes, imbues each of us with a unique “odorprint,” like a fingerprint. Previous research has revealed that human females preferred the musk of sweaty T-shirts worn by men with suitably different MHC genes.

Because scores, if not hundreds, of unidentified odorants comprise an odorprint, Oxford’s Wyatt has argued that it cannot be considered a pheromone in the classic sense. Evidently, the complex cloud of aromas we emit needs a lot more parsing before science closes the book on pheromones

Pheromones or no pheromones, we all know how much importance odor or body scents play in sexual relations, especially to females. You ask a random lady what she first notices in a guy and a lot of them would say his smell, body and mouth. It’s a great turn on and can be the most effective turn offs.

Whether or no pheromones work in humans or not, smell is always be relevant. Pheromones are controlled by your body but how you smell is controlled by you, so take control of it.

What do you think of pheromones? Do you agree with them? Do you think they affect our sexual decisions or activities? Let me know all about it in the comment section below ๐Ÿ˜‰.

If you wanna read up on it more, here are the sources;

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_pheromone

https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/sex-life-phermones

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/pheromones-sex-lives/

Well then members of Amy’s Clan, till next week for another post. I love you all so much, thank you for all your likes, comments and repost. You guys are amazing. Stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy.

Amy โฃ๏ธ

The Modern Feminist

Hey guys!!! It’s another week, and another blog post on…

So, how has your week been? Been in any twitter gender wars recently? Well, I haven’t. Generally trying to stay away from the toxicity that is that bird app. I’ll rather come here to rant with you guys and today, we are dealing with the tweet in that image below. Yeah? Lets dive into in.

I don’t know when it will be clear to the people on the streets of twitter and perhaps generally, that feminism isn’t a gender versus movement, it’s a gender equality movement. These things are some of the things that feminism itself is trying to eradicate. THE MALE BOX. The belief that men have to have one thing or the other to be considered “manly” enough to be male. Some of those things are what are stated above.

Now my response to that question above would be; her virginity, her youth, cooking and home making skills, subservience etc… One might argue that those things aren’t the same or on the same level as the ones above but we need to realize that the society who made those rules wasn’t interested in male and females being equal in any way. In that society, value is placed on what a man can make and value is placed on what a woman is. Meaning, men are expected to make money and riches, women are expected to be young, pure and submissive to preserve the master and submissive roles. Now, in the current day and age, with women rebelling and choosing to be whatever they want to be, with feminism and all, it’s starting to seem unfair to the males who still seem stuck with those rules and instead of facing the society that makes those rules and try to break free of them, they are committed to making life a living hell for those who are trying to pave a way for themselves. Do you see how very annoying and counterproductive that is?

So, let us imagine that more males were invested in breaking free of the unfair pressure society puts on them which would in turn make the lives of females easier and we can all work towards the common goal that is making a better society, wouldn’t life be great? Instead, we have them milling to twitter every second dissecting every tweet by the female and feminist community in the name of ‘weeding’ them out.

Fellow men, women are not your problems, feminism isn’t your enemy, this warped society we live in is what we should try to combat. I hope we all understand. I am gonna drop an episode of my podcast down below which is on this same subject and hopefully, the message is understood.

It’s actually CLASH OF CLANS I want you to listen to but WordPress has decided to frustrate my effort today, so another episode is highlighted. Just click on clash of clans below.

Season 3, Episode 11: Picture Story Expressions

"Self love is a journey, not a destination." ~Amy 2021 My journey through self awareness to self love and the role picture taking had. I hope you enjoy, thank you ๐Ÿ˜Š. Don't forget to share and sturvs
  1. Season 3, Episode 11: Picture Story
  2. Expressions With Amy
  3. Mother's Day Special
  4. Mental health; Being vulnerable
  5. Season 3 Episode 7: When In Rome
  6. Season 3 Episode 6: Whose Battle Are You Fighting?

At this stage of the blog post, i’m hoping you completely understand my point of view and we would all do better at dismantling this patriarchal society which really doesn’t serve anyone.

As usual, I would love to hear your thoughts so please lay them on me in the comment section and lets discuss. Till the next post, stay safe, stay sane and stay healthy. I love you all.

Amy

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